Sunday, March 21, 2010

Our early arrival....

I am actually laughing right now because my pregnancy ticker says that I am 37 weeks pregnant which is funny considering that he actually came 17 days ago! That is right, Jackson William Hammans made a surprise appearance on March 4, 2010 after a little bit of a scare. Although he is a little small he is healthy and strong and home with us. Here is our story about the week that Jackson came into our lives:

Saturday (the 28th) we moved into a new townhouse. After a long day of moving (don't worry, I didn't do much, just babysit Wyatt!) we all went out to Mexican food. That night I just did not feel myself. I was pretty uncomfortable and had some sharp back pain. I asked the girls about it at dinner and they all agreed that they had some back pain towards the end of their pregnancies too so I just tried to breath and make myself more comfortable. Later that night, the pain got 10x worse. I was having sharp, shooting pain down my back and stabbing pain in my tummy. After hours of trying to tough it out, I finally called the doctor. She asked me if it felt like contractions. I told her "no" because the pain did not come and go, it was constant. She told me it did not sound like labor but possibly that the baby was pushing on a nerve so I needed to lay on my side, drink lots of water and rest. As soon as I hung up the phone, I was in tears. "Rest and drink water! What did she think I was doing! I was in pain!" That night I think I got like 45 minutes total of sleep. The next morning the pain was still there but not as bad. I got up, got dressed, and Kyle and I left to go clean the old apartment. That night, same thing, extreme back and stomach pain, not to mention I was so swollen: my hands, my feet, my face. But again, I dismissed that it was anything but 3rd trimester pain. For the next 4 days, I was in so much pain. Each night Kyle and I were up all hours of the night as I was doubled over in pain. Nothing helped: Tylenol pm, heating pad.... I was miserable. On Wednesday (the 3rd), I got up to go to work. I still felt pain but not as much however, I could not find a single pair of shoes that fit my extremely swelled feet (we are talking 3x the size!) Kyle and I tried to shove every pair I owned on. I was bawling thinking how can I teach in bare feet. After I managed to squeeze my poor feet into the largest pair I could find, I went to work. That day I felt horrible, I could not teach, I was in so much pain. I ended up leaving at 1:30 in the afternoon because I thought I was going to pass out from the pain. I went home early, took a bath and tried to catch up on some sleep. That night, the pain increased and I finally had enough. I called my Mom around 3am crying and she demanded that I wake Kyle and go to the hospital. After she finally convinced me (I was pretty stubborn) I called another doctor on call and he recommended I come in just get it checked out. So at 3:30 in the morning, we left for the hospital.

At the hospital, triage was expecting me and the first thing they did was check my temp and blood pressure. As soon as they did, I saw the nurses' eyes get big as she read my blood pressure 200/110 which is extremely high (most blood pressure gauges only go to 180. Needless to say they were very concerned and had me lay on my side to rest and calm down. For the next 30 minutes, they checked my blood pressure every 5 minutes. It was not going down. Also, my urine test had come back and I had a large quantity of protein in my urine. My platelet (responsible for clotting) level was very low and my liver was enlarged. The doctor came in and told me I was in not so good of shape and I will never forget his words, "Well, you are not going home tonight. You are having this baby today!" Kyle and I were shocked. I began to cry because I was so scared. Scared for my son who was about to come 41/2 weeks early. Plus, we were not ready. Yes, ready to be parents but we had no bag packed (everything was still in boxes from the move!) No clothes washed, no car seat in the car, no childbirth class (we were suppose to take them that weekend), no camera, no change of clothes...NOTHING! Kyle looked a little panicked but I could tell he was trying to be brave for me. I was scared to death. The doctor said I had preeclamsia and on top of it something called HELLPS syndrome. HELLPS syndrome is a variant of preeclampsia. There are three phases. Phase 1: High blood pressure and swelling. Phase 2: Enlargement of the organs (this was causing my back pain) Phase 3: swelling of the brain. I was in phase 2 and the doctors said I needed to get the baby out fast before I went into phase 3 and may have a stroke or a seizure. After I was wheeled up to my room and admitted, they started me on patocin to start labor moving. To make matters worse, for some reason, I was not going to be able to have an epidural because my platelet level was so low. So I sat there for the next hour in shock and fear and panic. An hour later, the doctor came in and said I was not progressing and for each hour we waited, my health was at risk. Also, if I delivered naturally, she was worried that because my platelets were low, I would not be able to clot properly. She said the best thing I could do was to have a c-section in an hour to get the baby out ASAP. Again, panic set in as I was not expecting a c-section. She said the baby would be small but that because he was past the 34 week mark (I was 35 weeks) his prognosis was good. Kyle and I both agreed we just wanted to do what was best for both me and the baby so we said yes to the c-section. Kyle has one hour till so he sped home as fast as he could to grab a few things (the camera, the car seat still in the box, toothbrush etc.) He returned and 20 minutes later we were talking to the anesthesiologist about the risks of the spinal block that I was going to have to make me numb. Everything happened so fast. Before I knew it, Kyle was in scrubs and we were being wheeled to the OR. Kyle waited outside while I was being prepped for surgery. Being numb from the neck down was the weirdest feeling ever. They put oxygen over my face and told me that some women have panic attacks because they can't feel their chest to breath. Great! Also, the medication makes you shake uncontrollably so they had to pin my arms down. Kyle came in and sat next to me as they put the sheet up. As I lay their shaking, I kept praying to God that Jackson would be ok. Before I even knew they started, I heard the doctor say, "Ok, Dad go ahead and look at your son." I saw Kyle stand up and look over as they pulled Jackson out. Jackson William Hammans was born on March 4th at 9:38 a.m. Immediately, we heard his little cry and we both began to sob. He was here!!! They did not let me see him because they had a team from the NICU waiting to work on him. I lay there and tried to catch a glimpse of him but there were too many people around him. Kyle kept telling me that he looked good. Then they took him down to the NICU. Kyle stayed with him till I was stitched up and then he went down to be with Jackson. They took me to recovery for the next three hours until I was able to get feeling back in my body. Finally, they wheeled me down to the NICU and I was able to see Jackson for a few minutes. He was all hooked up with tubes in his belly and his mouth and nose. It was sooooo hard to see him like that. Then, they wheeled me back up to my room. I did not get to see Jackson again for another day because of my high blood pressure and recovery from my c-section. Kyle would go down and see him and then take pictures to show me. It was the hardest time ever not seeing my little boy. On top of it all, I was extremely swollen and sick from all the medicine. I was throwing up every hour and it was so painful because of my incision. It was a rough 24 hours.

We were first told that Jackson would be in the hospital for 3 weeks but by the next day, they changed it to a week. He was 6lbs 7ozs (good size for a preemie). Can you imagine how big he would have been in 5 more weeks! Yikes! But he was a little fighter down there and he was able to get all of his tubes out by day 3. We are so blessed he was as big as he was. Being down in the NICU was not fun. There were babies down there that were soooooo tiny. One baby had been there since December 20th. It broke my heart to see these babies. We were so fortunate that Jackson was as strong as he was. I was finally able to go down and visit him once my blood pressure was better. By day 4 he was ready to come up to our room....praise the Lord! The doctors were so impressed with how quickly he was recovering. They were mostly worried about his underdeveloped lungs because he was 4 1/2 weeks early. On March 8th (Monday) I was recovered enough to go home and Jackson got to come with us. We are so thankful to all the nurses and doctors that took such good care of us.

I am so in love with my son. It is true that no one can tell you how much love you have for your child but I can honestly say my heart is overflowing. He is such a good little boy and he is getting stronger everyday. He lost a little weight but now he is gaining it back and is at 6lbs 2 oz. I can't wait for you to meet him someday. My blood pressure is still a little high and I am taking medication 3x a day to get it down. I have been laying low the past week. My mother and mother-in-law have been AMAZING. As soon as they heard I was going into labor they jumped on planes and got here as fast as they could. They have done so much for us. Unpacked our boxes, laundry, cooking, painted the nursery. I could not have done it without them. They are needless to say in love with their grandson (1st one on both sides). We are all doing well and loving being a family. It was quite a scary experience but God put his angels around Jackson and me and healed our bodies.

Unfortunately, the likelihood me getting preeclampsia again is very good but at least we will be aware of it now. Thank you again for all your thoughts and prayers. I miss and love you all and can't wait for you to meet Jackson.


Our first family photo!


In the NICU....poor little guy

Getting stronger.....


Our beautiful miracle......so in love!